This is my first attempt at writing a blog. I've tried journals in the past but to no avail. For this first blog I thought it would be good to write about my thoughts on my present state in life, namely as a platoon leader of a precision targeting intelligence team in Baghdad, Iraq among other things.
At 2am on a sleepless night on the first day of December in my chu on a small base in Baghdad I sit here attempting to break into a world that seems to be sweeping my generation. I wonder if I'm worth reading and realize that I write this not for anyone but myself, and maybe one day my children.
Every day I find a new challenge to overcome, a new obstacle to conquer. How do these situations keep finding me? Was it because I once asked God to send me challenges because I arrogantly thought I could take anything on? Because I believe I'm better in stressful situations than I am in relaxed ones? Are those suppositions really true?
I then find myself wondering if what I'm doing here is really worth it. Am I really making a difference? If so then for whom? For the people of Iraq? For the people of the United States? For my team? For myself even? Some days I unequivocally believe I'm making all the difference in the world, that the world would not be better without my efforts. Other days I believe the world won't even notice my efforts. Which is the truth or are they both true? What can one man do in a world of chaos and violence? Better yet, why do I find myself so comfortably in such a world?
I assume that most people ask themselves the same general questions at some point in their life. Why am I here? What was I made for? Will I do a good job at what I was made to do? Will it even matter? I find myself asking all of these questions and realizing that the answers don't matter to me. I trust my God, my instincts, my team, my family and my friends.
The facts. I'm a 1st Lieutenant in the US Army. Most of what I do is classified and will never make it into this blog or any other website. I am currently deployed to Iraq as a platoon leader. I am a brother to Paul, a son to Dennis and Carolyn, a nephew to many, a cousin to many, an uncle to Aubrey, a friend to many, a grandson to Harold, and a leader to a few. I graduated from Talawanda High School and Cedarville University both in Ohio. I studied International Studies, History, Political Science, Public Administration and the Bible. I won election as the Vice President of College Republicans at Cedarville and participated in many organizations. I enjoy reading, watching movies and tv shows, some video games, spending time with friends, shooting weapons of various kinds. Blatant dishonesty, misplaced priorities, and needlessly repeating myself annoy me most. I would love one day to hold a political office, have a career as a federal field agent, be married and have 2-3 kids. I've never been able to continue blogs or journals and so I hope to make this one last through deployment.
If you've made it through this first post I applaud you and ask that you encourage me to continue. I can't say when my next post will be due to my irregular schedule.
